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By J. D. Oxblood

What does the Kentucky Derby have to do with New York City, you ask?  The answer is twofold:  the Kentucky Derby is the first of three races in the Triple Crown, which culminates in the Belmont Stakes, held right here on Long Island, AND, as it turns out, there are a lot of Kentucky transplants to New York.  And if this blog is dedicated to culture, we should focus our lens wherever culture is found, no matter how hillbilly, depraved or—in this case—well-lubricated.

Handicapping the Derby is always a crap shoot, and this year was no exception.  In a race with 20 horses, anything can happen, especially when so many of them are essentially untested.  Favorite Dunkirk was going after the Roses with only 4 starts under his saddle.  Favorite Friesan Fire was optimism incarnate for trainer “Cowboy” Jones, following a devastating tragedy last year when show horse Eight Belles had to be euthanized seconds after the race with two shattered legs.  I Want Revenge, the heavy favorite, scratched the day before the big race.  Pioneerof the Nile [sic] never caught my eye because of the wonky spelling—exactly the kind of nonsense that proves I’ll never be an adept handicapper.

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